Right. 2016. Here we go.
I know it's April, but following January's false start (I'm now not so sure that winning an Emmy, Grammy, Oscar and Tony is realistically achievable in a year) I've decided to write more.
Here are a list of short stories I plan to write in 2016 - fortunately since I know nobody reads this blog, they're safe from plagiarism. And if they are stolen, chances are you'll do a better job than me. Good luck to you.
STAGE FRIGHT - Tense drama about a stand-up comedian who will literally die on stage if nobody laughs at one of his jokes.
THE EROTIC ADVENTURES OF YOUNG MISS MARPLE - Miss Marple origin story, detailing her early life and motivation to solve crimes. In a sexy way.
TELEGRAM FOR YOU MA'AM - A '30s hotel Bell Boy becomes obsessed with a long-distance couple who have taken to sexting by Telegram.
“I’M A MONSTER” - A Monster's journey of self-discovery and acceptance
THE INVIGILATOR - A violent action thriller set in the exam hall of an adult eduction college.
DADDY LONG LEGS MAN - An unlikely story about a superhero with no discernible powers. Does something stronger lurk within?
A WHALE THAT WANTS TO LEARN FOREIGN LANGUAGES - The rest of the pod think she's pretentious following an exchange trip to the North Atlantic, but can Sandrine's new-found knowledge save the species?
I'D KILL FOR A GOOD STORY - A literary agent decides to make up for his own mediocrity by murdering talented writers and stealing their work. But tables turn when he goes after a flashy crime-writer...
HIGH FIDELITY 2016 - A girl who works for Buzzfeed can’t stop making top 10 lists about her relationships - can she give up GIFs for the man of her dreams?
IT'S ALL MEMEME - A photogenic raccoon finds himself the subject of an internet meme - how will he cope with his new-found fame?
A NOVEL KIDNAPPING - (Revenge thriller) A famous author has her dreams of retiring shattered when her publishers take her daughter hostage, demanding more books.
GOVE AND HUNT - Michael Gove and Jeremy Hunt go on a holiday together - it's The Trip To Italy, except the characters are less likeable.
FEMALE SPIES - (A serious historical novel) A band of female spies fight the Nazis. Sometimes with their bare hands.